Gazing at rows full of dishes, I sigh. Beautifully clean and completely dry due to my husband’s love affair with Jet Dry, another load of dishes to be emptied into cupboards. There was a time a few years ago when we had no dishwasher, and I basked in all the bonding time with children over dishes. Then we realized that there is a such thing as too much bonding…a little mystery in a relationship keeps the magic alive.
When the dishwasher arrived, it was a gift of technology. Then as in all things, emptying it got old too, especially cutlery. I am not sure at what point I would be content in the dish-cleaning process. Maybe if they all evaporated after we used them and appeared in the cupboard spotless. Nah, I’d probably start complaining that the speed at which they disappeared and reappeared was too slow.
This human is never satisfied.
Speaking of humans, two of my favourite humans left the family nest to do some traveling for a couple of weeks. It’s the first time pieces of my heart went across an ocean without me and also the first time I was left with an almost empty nest. With trepidation and cautious joy, I waved goodbye, knowing they would come back different people than when they left and that they would have problems that I could not solve for with them.
The two weeks flew by, and I learned some things about myself and empty nesting, both the pros and the cons.
The Pros
There is a world in which people empty the dishwasher once a day, not three, and go to bed without stacks of dishes in the sink because the dishwasher is behind.
Feeding, watering, providing medications for, and cleaning up after five more animals (three lovebirds and two guinea pigs) and three big cages is still easier than figuring out what to make for dinner when feeding the spectrum of carnivores to vegans.
You can have coffee with people and have a conversation that includes the words personal trainer, and you find yourself coming home and contemplating this idea because you are drunk on all the extra free time (this could go on the cons list too).
You clean the house, and it stays clean for longer than 24 hours.
It stays even tidier because the one child whose day you can track through the trail they leave through the house is away. This apparently is the sign of a creative mind which they indeed have in spades, but as the saying goes, behind every wildly creative soul, there is someone with a Swiffer, a laundry basket of clean underwear, and a day planner.
The suspect list for towel hoarding has been reduced to two.
The restaurant to eat out at can be chosen with a simple conversation as opposed to an online family survey.
An amendment to the above…you can afford to eat out.
You get to finish your thoughts without being interrupted…as often…still have dogs
The Cons
There are 50% less things to laugh about and people to laugh with.
Finding out how everyone is doing is more difficult because some people have forgotten how to text their mother.
You will receive a frozen pizza for Mother’s Day dinner (just kidding…it was wonderful…I have a low bar!).
Your spouse and you have 66% less things to talk about.
You will realize that the reason you do not get your writing done is because you fail to make it a priority, not because the kids take up all your time.
You get to finish your thoughts and are shocked at both the quantity and lack of quality.
There is no trail of stuff around the house.
Well, they are back now and following the trail around the house, they spent a lot of money and had a fabulous time. Ronnie has fallen multiple times into the suitcases decorating the living room, and there have been repeated requests for us to install a bidet. Overall though, they are happy to be home, but sorry to say goodbye to their adventuring and their friends.
As for myself when analyzing the results and coming to a consensus about which was better the empty nest or the warmth of a home fully loaded, the answer is ridiculously obvious…
Running the dishwasher once a day is miraculous. When’s the next trip, guys!? Love you!
Text from the young adult who left stating firmly that they were NOT going to use a bidet…
Feeling great, went to 7 eleven. Used the HEATED toilet. The bidet is also game-changing in the toilet industry.
My life will forever be divided into two segments…Before I ever used a bidet and the Age of Enlightment. - Unknown
haha..it is those moments of chaos that we miss the most!